In a great scene from 1995’s Die Hard With a Vengeance, a switchboard operator screams in bemusement as “half the goddamned city” of New York dials 911 in response to a bomb scare publicized on a popular radio show. The humor the line entices from the audience is quite reactionary and real, but so is the response from the millions of New Yorkers whose children attend schools across the city. Naturally, a panic ensues.
My own response to tonight’s “micro moon”–the new year’s smallest full moon on record–mirrored that of the switchboard operator and the whole of New York in that scene. As I began my weekly run with a local running group, a friend mentioned the moon and the day’s general craziness. A consensus resulted, with mentions of monotonous meetings, crazy kids and cantankerous coworkers. As if to sanction the conversation, a small cadre of emergency services vehicles then whizzed by with lights flashing and sirens blazing.
And all I could think was, “micro moon my ass!”
What the hell was going on? Granted, Boston’s usually crazy.
But seriously, people. What-the-collective-f#$&!? The hours at work were long, arduous and painful. The majority of the people I encountered during my otherwise event-less commutes were irritable and nonplussed. And all the police cars and firetrucks and ambulances–you would’ve thought the zombie apocalypse was in progress! (Then again, that still may be the case…)
Calm the hell down, people. Go home, enjoy your lives, and remember that you’ve still got the remainder of this week to look forward to (or down on) before the three-day weekend hits. It’s not necessarily getting better any time soon, so you might as well suck it up and let the “micro moon” pass.
Otherwise, this great city will turn itself inside out even further than it already routinely does. And if that happens, we’re truly screwed.